Poetic Justice
The
SubVerse Poetry Competition
Celebrating
the Joy of Discipline
Angelic Anthems and Demonic Dirges
The
Rules
Entries are invited
for the ongoing SubVerse Poetry Competition. Judges will be looking for Angelic
Anthems in the Best Poem Category and Demonic Dirges in the Worst Poem
Category. Please mark your entries Best Poem Category or Worst Poem Category
and email them to elle.finn@btinternet.com. The reward for the
winners in the "Best Poem Category" is to publicly receive sensitive
poetic appreciation from the "The Poetry Mentor from Heaven". This
may entail physical appreciation as well as verbal appreciation. The punishment
for losers in the "Worst Poem Category" is to publicly receive
"Extreme Literary Criticism" at the hands of "The Literary
Critic from Hell". This may entail physical humiliation as well as verbal
humiliation. The competition is ongoing and open to
all, including the judges. The winning and losing poems will be published in
the Winter editions of the on-line and real-life
SubVerse Updates along with their appreciations and critiques.
The Results
The remaining months of 2004 come to an end and the fourth leg of the
SubVerse Poetry Competition comes to a close and all that remains for me to say
are my customary congratulations to the winner and my obligatory commiserations
to the loser. And so, let the judging commence.
An Angelic Anthem
A sensitive
appreciation of the winning poem
By the Poetry
Beauty is indeed an
appropriate name for imdwhisper’s winning poem. I was struck by the strong
imagery, deep emotions and eloquent phrases in the poet’s sweet lament. It has
the air of Greek myth and a grand epic scale all encompassed in a teasingly
brief poetic package. Well done and thank you for such a breath of fresh,
intoxicating air. An angelic anthem indeed!
Beauty (Dedicated to P. You know who You are) by imdwhisper One was struck from the Earth too soonJust His luck; the jealous moonBut find His mate he did at onceWhisked Her away to where'er whence A sultry dream became a spellAnd subdued spirit came to quellThen became a blissful peaceShe fell in love with eternal ease She half each year dwelt in acquiesceWithout the fears of wanton happinessCried no tears for nothing missedAllied no leers; her soul was kissed Occasion contracted stated thusAbrasion extracted that She mustAnd gratify much to Her disgustTo satisfy such Her mother's lust A Demonic Dirge
A severe critique of
the losing poem
From the Literary
Critic from Hell
When one is asked to
judge the worst poem category of elle finn’s ludicrous poetry competition, one
does not expect to have to comment on a poem that rhymes, scans well and makes
sense. IMD whisper’s poem is far too good for this section, in my opinion it is
far better than the poems he entered in the “best poem category”. Any more of
this ridiculous nonsense and I will be forced to hang up my quill and abandon
my judgely position. A demonic dirge? Hardly!
Negotiation by imdwhisper Oh my dear sweet fair mistressWhy are you being such a Bitch?I've straightened neat this mattressYou seem to suggest there's a glitch Well my little submissiveThere's things you won't understandI seem a little abusiveBecause it swings forth my demand Though n'er would I want to refuse YouI'm sure that you know how I doteIt's just I don't like to amuse TwoI'd always lose out on the vote I see now your worries my darlingBe assured that it's just You and MeMy aim was to be more startlingA game, I see it worked Tee Hee
Voluptuous Verse and Ridiculous Rhymes
The
Results
The third instalment of the ongoing SubVerse Poetry Competition is now
over. Congratulations to the winners of the Best Poem Category for their voluptuous
verse and commiserations to the losers of the Worst Poem Category with their
ridiculous rhymes. The winning and losing poems are featured in a special
edition of the winter real-life and on-line SubVerse Update entitled “Poetic
Justice 2003: Voluptuous Verse and Ridiculous Rhymes”. They are accompanied by
sensitive poetic appreciation of the winning poetry from the Poetry Mentor from
Heaven and severe literary criticism of the losing poetry from the Literary
Critic from Hell. To learn more about poetic discipline please visit the
SubVerse Poetry Tea Room at:-
http://www.elle.finn.btinternet.co.uk/SubVerse.htm
Best Poem Category
Versus Mind by Juned
Ahsan (Extract)
My whole body want to sense her
but my mind says no
I asked my mind why it is always no
it said 'cause she is betrothed to someone else
Oh! yes I know I know but still
My eyes ....
Best Poem by Alison Miles (Extract)
Everything
seems silenced by ugly
That's
how the cracks get in
And
love falls apart
Where the binding begins.
Punishment? By Alex Oxford (extract)
You
act the innocent with me
But
that will not avail you,
For now
you’ll bend and lift your skirt,
Your
sweet desire won’t fail you.
Voluptuous Verse
Sensitive poetic
appreciation of the best poetry winners
A review by the Poetry
Mentor from Heaven
Versus Mind by Juned Ahsan
I
found the sentiments in this poem sensuous and deep, beautifully encapsulated
in a rhythmic and circular setting which was enchanting in its simplicity.
Best Poem by
Alison Miles
This
poem began softly in gentle and quiet mode and built into the frightening
brutality of lovers at war before finally ending on the separation caused by
stifling emotional
bondage. It is at the same
time complex and open, surreal and moving.
Punishment? By Alex Oxford
This
is a sincere story told in old fashioned rhyme which paints a vivid picture of
a BDSM scene as full of love and tenderness as it is harsh and explicit. Spankingly good!
Worst
Poem Category
BDSM by Sarah Hartwell, 2003 (Extract)(Tune: YMCA, Village People) Young man [gal], there's no need to feel down,I said, young man [gal], 'cause you're in a new town,I said, young man [gal], there are pervs all around,There's no need to feel so lonely. Young man [gal], why not look for a munch,I said, Young man [gal], with a map and some lunch,You can chat there, have a drink and a dish,It's a place to talk 'bout fetish. It's fun to chat about B-D-S-M.It's fun to chat about B-D-S-M.They've seen everything so no need to feel coy,You can chat about fav'rite toys ... It's fun to chat about B-D-S-M.It's fun to chat about B-D-S-M.You can chat to the pervs, you can make some new friends,No need to feel at a loose end ... Ridiculous Rhymes
Severe literary
criticism of the worst poetry losers
A review by the
Literary Critic from Hell
BDSM by Sarah Hartwell
The
worst thing about Ms Hartwells’ latest “effort” is
that I actually quite liked it. However there is still plenty to criticise, so
I will do my best to point out my most serious objections.
Parodies
of songs by the laughably gay 1970s group “the Village People” are old hat and
futile. I believe even the Two Ronnies have had a go
at them, at least I remember Ronnie Barker once dressed up as a red Indian, but
I digress. The commendable idea of promoting munches to the newbie BDSMer via comedy verse is elongated unnecessarily ad-nauseum by the chosen pop song medium. The grammar is
appalling. The line “don’t forget to take map” is just one of many sad
examples.
That
said, the standard of this year’s bad poetry was
woefully good. If things continue in this vain I shall soon be forced into
writing something really positive. Come on you losers! You can do much worse
than this!
Humility @ Lovers Lane by Bijou Shell
my lover is kind to me
his kindness protects me
it makes me high
and turns into dependency
my lover owns me
it is clear by my complacency
i can't live without him
i think that i am needy
my lover disciplines me
when he is disappointed
in me
i try to redeem myself
meekly
THE ROPES by S Hartwell (Llewtrah)
(Extract)
Now, roses and violets please many a wench,
But I've found a taste for the cane and the bench,
And bunches of blossoms be treated with scorn,
It's "To hell with the roses - just give me the thornes!"
I wish I was something to you, anything,
Even just a piece of meat.
I'd be honoured for my flesh to get to know
your teeth.
Love And Friendship by Juned Ahsan
(extract)
Love is a feeling by hearts
and not for those who do flirts.
Do not mix love with any logic
as it could make relationship toxic.
This year’s winning poems explore the many diverse
aspects of BDSM in a warm and friendly manner. The playful B&D elements as
well as the more intense aspects of S&M are explored in S. Hartwell’s funny
and charming “The Ropes”. Bijou Shell’s poem explores the exquisite feelings of
humility and dependency she discovers through her submission to a kind and
protective lover. “To a Carnivorous Man” speaks volumes about the all-consuming
nature of love and BDSM. “Love and Friendship” is a pure and simple poem about
the surrender of love and the warmth of friendship in more vanilla terms. Well
done to all our winners. Sub-lime!
S & M BLUES by Llewtrah (
Come along and listen
to,
The sado-masochistic blues,
Walk over me in spike-heeled shoes,
And whip me till I'm black and blue.
CHORUS:
Tie me up, tie me down,
Peg me helpless on the ground,
Use a blindfold, use a gag,
I find straight sex such a drag.
Thoughts by Hard Task
Master
Is SubVerse
The converse
Of DomVerse?
Or:
To reverse
Is DomVerse
The obverse
Of SubVerse
The SM-Poets Tea Party by elle finn
Sung to the tune of The Teddy Bear's
Picnic
If you go to the tea room today
You're sure of a big surprise
If you go to the tea room today
You'd better go in disguise
For every kink that ever there was
Is gathered there together because
Today's the day that BDSMers
write poetry
Poetry Time for sadomasochists
The sadomasochists are thinking up new
rhymes today
Hear them gaily read their verse
And give their kinky fun some philosophy
See them gaily sip their tea
The Doms,
subs, switches and tops and bottoms
Are having a ball
They've put down their blindfolds, whips
and chains
And picked up their pens instead
Because they're tired of their negative
press
SM Limericks by Various Writers
Rosalina a subby young lass,
Had a truly
magnificent ass,
Not rounded and pink,
As you possibly think,
But was grey, had long
ears and ate grass.
There once was a Dom from
Whose sub, he thought he had lost her,
But he found in the grass,
The marks of her arse
And the knees of the guy that had crossed
her.
The Silly Side of Surrender
A review by the
Literary Critic from Hell
This year’s worst poetry was so abysmal it had to be bolstered
up by a selection of really bad, really old SM Limericks from the SubVerse
murky archives. Fortunately S. Hartwell has donated several hideously atrocious
sing-along SM “classics” of which “S&M Blues” is one of the most
presentable. Unfortunately this lyrical monstrosity inspired one of the judges
to get up in the wee small hours of the morning and write her own sing-along SM
“classic” to the tune of The Teddy Bears Picnic. “The SM Poets Tea Party” is a
homage to elle finn’s
laughably imaginary literary institution “The SubVerse Poetry Tea Room”. So
little thought has obviously gone into Hard Task Master’s “Thoughts” they
barely deserve the name. Come on you losers, you can do much worse than this!
Winner
of the Best Poem Category
'Night Pangs' by Courtney (copyright: Courtney 2000) (Extract)
*****************
Firm
pillows plumped in position on the bed.
A leather belt conspicuous across the top.
Where I soon will be.
The mirror tells a stubborn reflection.
Which will mellow mightily by night's end.
Even now, nervous guilt and queasy anticipation mold
me malleable by the
minute.
Midnight blue thong delves deep between pale moon glow.
He wants crisp contrast: cream-white, bright red, deep blue.
Patriotic fervor having little to
do with love of country, but more with the
current lay of the land.
My long hair hangs straight to my rounded hips.
Lady Godiva embarking on her
nightly ride, with crimson face and scarlet
bottom warming her stark nakedness.
******************
Courtney’s poem
describes a sensuous discipline session she receives at the hands of her
dominant lover. Her attention to detail and clever use of the different sensual
stimuli of hearing, sight, smell, taste and touch transport the reader into the
scene with her. Through her description I could feel myself not just as an
observer but as a participant. The overall feeling I received from the poem was
one of excited anticipation from waiting alone in the bedroom listening to my
lover’s car arrive to kneeling on the bed after already being intensely
disciplined, awaiting more sensual excitement at the hands of a sexy Dominant
man. A worthy winner.